Monday, April 14, 2008

Hang in There!

This is what I'm talking about: this is just one more example of the slow, painful, excruciating death of the English language. This phenomenon has been sweeping the internet and has multiple spin-offs. The thing that is truly sad, however, is that the whole point of that horrible website is to take funny pictures of animals and come up with ways to use 'lite speak (or whatever they're calling it) by warping the English language into a combination of phonetics and excruciatingly bad grammar.

And, yes, I know the theory behind the website is that cats don't have lips and so can't pronounce "have." Were they able to speak, they could only say "has," which was made somehow more cool here by changing the s to a z. If this were truly the guidelines for the accompanying text, however, it would have to say, "I can haz cheezdurger." And since when were cat ladies "cool," anyway?

Whatever happened to the good old "hang in there" posters? You know, the ones that are cloyingly sweet but at least practice passable language arts? Are those somehow less cool than the annoying "I can haz cheezburger"?

I'm officially boycotting this website. I might even start a major--and I mean major--leaflet campaign. Hang in there, English! I'm in the minority, but I might still save you, yet.

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